unattainable dreaming

I dream of white picket fences and wrap around porches,

small town parades and afternoon picnics.

I dream of lemonade from the stand outside on our porch, where the neighbors walk to visit our

children and put quarters in their mason jars.

I dream of gardens and reading books by the pool out back.

I dream of being walking distance from the farmers market downtown and never having to worry too much about traffic and parking.

I dream of painting the house in vibrant colors:

our living room teal with vibrant sofas,

the bedroom forest green and an oasis of plants,

the library maroon with floor to ceiling shelves and a sliding ladder.

I dream of our kids riding their bikes around the neighborhood and drawing with chalk with the child next door.

I dream of this while laying awake,

with the fear that that’s all it’ll be: a dream.